Of course, the courtship style presents its own set of difficulties.While many courtship advocates see it as the only choice for finding a mate, others find it oppressive and overly controlling.While there are non-Christians who date with the intention of having a series of intimate physical relationships, for the Christian this is not acceptable and should never be the reason for dating.Many Christians see dating as little more than friendship and maintain the friendship aspect of their dating until both people are ready to commit to each other as potential marriage partners.Are we supposed to be actively looking for a spouse? It's one of those words with which most people are familiar, but have vastly differing opinions of what it means. It summons visions of men women with small tokens of affection and asking their hand in marriage on bended knee.However, between the late 1800s and the first few decades of the 1900s the new system of "dating" added new stages to courtship.One of the most obvious changes was that it multiplied the number of partners (from serious to casual) an individual was likely to have before marriage.
"Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God" (1 Corinthians , NKJV).First and foremost, dating is a time when a Christian finds out if his or her potential marriage partner is also a believer in Christ.The Bible warns us that believers and unbelievers should not marry each other, because those living in the light (of Christ) and those living in the darkness cannot live in harmony (2 Corinthians -15).If they find this hard to do, they must take steps to ensure that Christ will always be honored during their time together and that sin is never given a chance to take hold of their relationship.Just as with the courting couple, the parents of the dating couple should be involved in the relationship, getting to know their child’s companion and being a source of wise and discerning advice and guidance for both of them.Many in a courtship relationship will not spend any time together unless family members, preferably parents, are present at all times.In addition, courting couples state up front that their intentions are to see if the other person is a suitable potential marriage partner.So one important point to understand right up front (and about which many inside and outside the church are confused) is that we have not moved a dating system into our courtship system.Since most young adults will marry, the process employed in finding a husband and wife is still considered courtship.Courtship advocates claim that courtship allows for the two people to truly get to know each other in a more platonic setting without the pressures of physical intimacy or emotions clouding their view. For daters, spending time alone with a member of the opposite sex whom we find attractive can present temptations that can be very hard to resist.The Christian dating couple must have boundaries in place and be committed to not crossing them.